Meet Abby

She is the newest member of our family and Jasmine's little sister.

Abby is the sweetest little girl, but definitely has the shih tzu stubborn streak.

We love her.

Wordless Wednesday

Happy Anniversary Sweetie

Four years ago I did the most romantic thing I have ever done. I married my sweetheart on Wailea Beach in Maui at sunset. We were barefoot and wearing Tommy Bahama clothing. I wore a haku lei in my hair and he wore a maile lei. I remember looking up at his tan, happy face and thinking "this is paradise." We were unaware of anything but the presence of our own little wedding party. Not only was it romantic, but it was one of the most fun things I have ever done. My new brother and sister-in-law were our witnesses. The minister and photographer were the only other souls I remember. The minister spoke of love and romance and gave a reading:

This ring is the symbol of the circle.
It has no beginning and no end.
It is the oldest symbol of God
And represents the eternal and
endless Love that links us together.

It was on this very special night that we both saw a moonbow.

In one way, it doesn't seem like four years have passed already. In another way, it seems like it has always been like this. You've changed my life and made me feel whole again.

Now we will feel no rain
For each of us will be shelter to each other.
And now we will feel no cold
For each of us will be warmth to each other.
Now there is no loneliness
We are two bodies, but there is one life before us and one home.
When evening falls, I'll look to you and there you'll be.
And I'll take your hand and you'll take mine
And we'll turn together and we'll look to the road we traveled to reach this-
The hour of our happiness.
It stretched far behind us, and our future lies ahead--
A long and winding road where every turning means discovery
All the hopes, new laughter, shared tears,
The adventure has just begun.

And it continues...

This is what was delivered to me today.


The delivery person said, "Are you Barbie? Somebody loves Barbie." That made me almost as happy as the flowers.

For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart.
It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.

Spring has finally, permanently sprung

Wordless Wednesday

Hug Someone Today

In memory and in honor of all those who died or were injured at Virginia Tech on April 16,2007

No More Mammograms

I’ve made a decision. I’m no longer going to allow myself to be screened for breast cancer by mammography. I have an appointment with my gynecologist next month and I am going to break the news to him then. Until he finds a local alternative for me, I will be relying on self-examination and, of course, his clinical examination.

This is not a decision I’ve made lightly. My mom had a mastectomy almost 28 years ago and I am considered high risk for breast cancer. In fact, I had my first mammogram before I was age 40. I’ve had about 4 or 5 mammograms total and the last two resulted in false positives. I can’t tell you the duress that caused me. And then to be told after re-testing that I have very dense breast tissue which caused shadows on the x-ray film. I’m not subjecting myself to that again!

Here are some things I’ve learned after reading extensively on the topic of mammography:

• That the American Cancer Society is “more interested in accumulating wealth than saving lives." This is according to the articles, Is the American Cancer Society more interested in cancer profit than cancer prevention? and The Cure Con: how you're being deceived by charities that claim to be racing for the cure for cancer and other chronic diseases.

• That there is no safe dose of radiation. Breast cancer is more easily caused by radiation than are other kinds of cancers. A mammogram delivers about 1,000 times more radiation than a chest x-ray, which may increase the risk of cardiovascular damage.

• By the time a mammogram can detect breast cancer, it has been present in your body for 8-10 years. If a tumor is large enough to be detected by a mammogram, it's already in an advanced stage, so very few cancers are caught in the earliest and most treatable stages.

• The compression required for mammograms can actually break down cancer tissue and rupture small blood vessels that support the cancer, causing it to spread. How is it that medical students are taught to examine breasts gently to keep any possible cancer from spreading, yet radiologists are allowed to manhandle them for a mammogram?

• Breast cancer is the leading cause of death in women between the ages of 40 and 55. These statistics have not changed since the introduction of the mammogram over 30 years ago. Studies have shown that women who have mammograms suffer about the same rates of death due to breast cancer as women who do not have mammograms.

• Mammography has nothing to do with prevention -- it detects cancers that have already occurred (if you are lucky as there is a common occurrence of false negatives).

• Cancer is not a disease. Cancer is just a name given to a pattern of symptoms appearing as a natural result of certain metabolic functions caused by lifestyle decisions. Cancer can't be cured with chemicals. It's no germ.

• That there are safe alternatives to the mammogram, such as digital mammography, digital infrared thermography, and the MRI.

• One of the most trusted sites I have come across for unbiased information is Breast Cancer Action.

The next time your doctor says you're due for a mammogram, tell him you're interested in an alternative technique. If every women does this every time the word "mammogram" comes up, sooner or later the medical community will get the message: The day of the mammogram is almost done.

To blog or not to blog

One thing that I’ve recently realized is that I either need to get on with this blog or forget it.

What is paralyzing me?

I read a variety of blogs every day. And I think I’ve finally figured it out. Perhaps that is my problem. I need to focus my attention on my own space. That is not to say that I should become some kind of blog hermit, rather that I should stop focusing on my own inadequacies and begin writing about my accomplishments. The purpose of establishing this place was to motivate myself to accomplish more, not to magnify my shortcomings (to myself).

I read about awe-inspiring creative art/knitting/crochet/quilting/needlepoint as well as bloggers who read an infinite number of interesting books, garden, cook and write brilliantly. Do any of these prolific overachievers have a full time job? Just saying.

I am a perfectionist and a procrastinator. This is not a good combination. If I can’t do everything perfectly well, then I don’t do anything.

I am a slow knitter, but I do it well. I can write when I put my mind to it. I have a demanding job, but they like me there and I don’t mind going in most days.

I am going to give this blog thing my attention for awhile to determine if it really will help me the way I initially thought. No one comes here except me anyway, so it’s not as though I have anything to lose. And, in my own defense, a lot has happened in the past year. I will write more about that later.

Now on to thinking about my next blog post.

The Secret

Have you seen the DVD or read the book, The Secret? If you are one of the few who don't know what I'm talking about, go here to watch a snippet of the movie on YouTube.

We all know about parts of The Secret. You've heard of the Power of Positive Thinking by Norman Vincent Peale.

When my daughter came home for Christmas, she was reading the book Ask and It Is Given: Learning to Manifest Your Desires by Esther and Jerry Hicks.

Now the film and book, The Secret, is making the concept of the universal law of attraction mainstream.

The New York and LA cosmopolitan crowd can make fun of The Secret to their heart's content, but this concept resonates with me because I used the law of attraction recently without realizing it.

I lived in the same small house for 21 years, part of that time with my ex-husband and part with my new husband. I raised my kids in that house. It was so past time for me to move from that house and I thought about it daily. I began waking up for several hours at night and I would fantasize about selling that home and buying a big, new, beautiful home. Soon I almost began to look forward to those sleepless nights. I would think about living in this new home in great detail and would go through my daily routine in the new house in my mind. I didn't share this with anyone, except to explain to my husband that I was having trouble sleeping and that I wanted a new home. That home sold in a little more than a week after listing it and we found our dream home about the same time. There were many obstacles we had to move through to reach the goal of the new home, but it happened! Down to many of the details I imagined during those sleepless nights.

After we moved into our new home, the sleepless nights stopped. I manifested my new home - in my mind.

Have you ever wondered what sets apart successful, happy people who are able to attain what they desire? See the film and you'll gain the insight.

I experienced it. I believe it.

All that we are is the result of what we have thought. - Buddha

Wordless Wednesday

Meet Jasmine

Jasmine is a nine-week-old Shih Tzu.

We rescued her last night.

She is the newest member of our family and we have already fallen in love with her.

Weirdly Accurate

What Your Soul Really Looks Like

You are a wanderer. You constantly long for a new adventure, challenge, or even a completely different life. You are a grounded person, but you also leave room for imagination and dreams. You feet may be on the ground, but you're head is in the clouds. You see yourself with pretty objective eyes. How you view yourself is almost exactly how other people view you. Your near future is calm, relaxing, and pretty much what you want. And it's something you've been anticipating for a while now. For you, love is all about caring and comfort. You couldn't fall in love with someone you didn't trust.

Inside the Room of Your Soul

Yellowstone and Bears

I'm spending this weekend recovering from a long Labor Day weekend spent in Yellowstone camping with friends.

This is a picture of the beach at Yellowstone Lake near Fishing Bridge. We fished, but didn't catch anything.

We saw bears! A lot of them. This was a first for me.

Just as we were getting ready to leave the park, we saw a black grizzly bear running through a field near Bridge Bay Campground.

It was exciting and frightening all at the same time.

Finding Tapestry Crochet

I've crocheted all of my life (off and on) and I have never heard of Tapestry Crochet until the other day when I came across this blog.

One of my sons wore a hat several years ago which I am sure was made in this fashion. I pondered on how I would make something like that for a long time. Well, now I finally have the answer.

Here is one review of the technique:

From Library Journal
In tapestry crochet, the artisan works with smooth yarns or threads in a variety of colors and a comparatively small hook in relation to fiber size. Those colors not currently in use are carried within the piece until needed again. The result is a dense fabric somewhat reminiscent of woven tapestry. Ventura first discovered tapestry crochet as a Peace Corps volunteer in Guatemala when she acquired some of the colorful tapestry-crocheted shoulder bags that are part of traditional Maya male attire.

I ordered Carol Ventura's books, Tapestry Crochet and More Tapestry Crochet, and I can't wait to get them and begin a project. I will surely make future posts about this technique.

The Story of a House

My grandparents bought this house fifty years ago. Some years later, I was brought to this house as a newborn infant from the hospital. I lived here when my dad was sent to Vietnam and my mom wanted to be close to family. I lived here with my grandmother when I was 20 years old and the mother of a toddler. My son learned to walk in this house. And so did I, as the many 8mm films my grandfather took of me on the front sidewalk will attest to.

I have an abundance of happy memories of this house from when I was young. It seemed much larger than it does now. I can picture my grandmother in her Sunday dress covered by an apron, making file gumbo in the kitchen that seems so tiny now. She somehow found room to feed the whole family. There was always plenty to go around.

When my grandmother could no longer care for the house and yard in 1999, I bought it myself. For the next six years, the people who inhabited this house did not treat it with the love and respect it deserved. It was finally vacated on March 17, 2005. I will not dwell here on how sad the house was the first time I saw it again on that day, but it was the worst the house has ever been.

For the past year and five months, my husband and I have been working to restore this special house. It has dominated our lives and our pocketbooks, but it has been a labor of love. We painted, plumbed, electrified, and scrubbed. We did much more than I can say here. And we learned even more. My relationship with my husband has grown stronger. I have immense respect for him. I have never seen anyone work harder than he has on this house because it was what I wanted. He has never lived here, but a piece of him will stay with this house forever and that is a good thing.

The house now has a new resident. The lease was signed last night. Although I've known the new resident for only a short time, I feel good about leaving the responsibility for this special house in his hands. I know from his profession and circumstances that he is an honorable person and will bring good energy into the house once again.

And now maybe I will have time to knit!

Scarves and Spare Time

This is a photo of my first completed knitting project after I rekindled my interest in knitting a couple of years ago. It is knit in rib stitch using no particular pattern. I made it for my daughter. She lived in Illinois when I made it for her; now she lives in Venice Beach, California. Maybe she can use it for a dresser scarf or something! I am not what you would call a prolific knitter...yet. Partly because of lack of time and partly because I am...well, slow.

My knitting will be much the same as this blog...getting better all the time!

On another note, I don't want to feel obligated or bore anyone who might come across this place by spouting excuses on why I haven't posted. So I will try not to do that, but for now I have to say that my *spare* time is being eaten by a rental house my husband and I are remodeling. We are at the point that we must get it completed and rented in the next couple of weeks in order to avoid financial ruin.

100 Things About Me

1. I finally met my soul mate.
2. We had the perfect wedding on the beach in Maui, barefoot, at sunset, with only two witnesses, a reverend and a photographer.
3. He knows how to make me laugh and I think that’s important.
4. He is the best kisser I’ve ever known.
5. I have six children, but I’ve only given birth to two; I would do anything for them.
6. I have three grandchildren who call me grandma, but they don’t look like me; I would do anything for them.
7. My picture appeared on the front page of the local newspaper in November 2005.
8. I’ve lived in Utah, Germany, Maine, Ohio and Alaska.
9. I am the oldest child of my parents and the oldest granddaughter all the way around.
10. I met my biological father when I was 32; it has been a blessing.
11. I love to say that I have two dads; I love them both the same.
12. I got hit in the mouth with a baseball bat when I was in 5th grade.
13. My parents wanted to sue the elementary school, but I wouldn’t let them.
14. I have had either a partial plate or a bridge to replace my top four front teeth ever since.
15. It was the worst thing that ever happened to me until the year 2000 when something worse happened.
16. I’ve almost always had long hair.
17. I used to be a brunette, but now I’m a blonde.
18. I once spent a summer prospecting for gold in the mountains of Idaho, north of Boise.
19. I've had five different last names during my lifetime - not all of them were due to marriage.
20. I claim no particular religion or political affiliation.
21. I am constantly looking for motivation to get fit and healthy.
22. I love to knit.
23. I love to crochet.
24. I learned to knit and crochet when I was nine.
25. I love to quilt.
26. I love to cross stitch.
27. I love to sew.
28. I love all fiber arts.
29. I am more proficient at some of these things than at others.
30. I’d rather think of these things as my art rather than crafts or hobbies.
31. I love to give gifts I’ve made with my own two hands.
32. I have crafting ADHD - I am a great starter, but a horrible finisher.
33. I have never worried about not having enough to do. If I didn't need an income to live, I would totally be able to keep myself busy and productive with all of my interests.
34. I like to write, but I think my daughter is a better writer than me.
35. I have a very demanding job that I like, but I’d rather be home knitting.
36. I love to dance and I always have.
37. My sisters and I used to turn the music up loud and dance when my parents were gone.
38. My sister just younger than me has ALS (Lou Gehrig’s disease).
39. I miss her.
40. My other sister and I no longer speak to each other.
41. I love photography and I have thousands of pictures.
42. I don’t like pictures of myself.
43. My favorite things to photograph are my children and sunsets.
44. I like to scrapbook.
45. I’ve always been shy. I am an INFJ Myers-Briggs personality type.
46. Some people mistake my shyness for snobbiness.
47. When I was in 6th grade, I went to five different schools; the other kids used to say I looked like Susan Dey.
48. I wasn't very popular in high school. I'm often surprised when people remember me, because I don't remember anyone from high school.
49. I love Sex and the City even though I’m nothing like any of the characters.
50. I’m addicted to HGTV, DIY and the Food Network.
51. I would be a professional student if I could afford it.
52. I never got my degree despite the fact that I had a full ride scholarship.
53. Family comes first.
54. I am a blend of 25% French Cajun, 25% German and 50% Dutch.
55. My maternal grandfather was the Cajun and he was always one of my most favorite people.
56. My grandfather was Catholic and my grandmother was Mormon.
57. I am not a Mormon, even though I live behind the Zion Curtain.
58. I hate polygamy, but I like HBO's new series Big Love.
59. I believe in aging gracefully. I would never consider plastic surgery.
60. I don’t wear makeup, but I do take care of my skin.
61. I keep my fingernails short and unpainted.
62. I love pedicures and soft feet.
63. The only jewelry I wear is my wedding ring, diamond earrings and a toe ring.
64. I love houseplants and I have a lot of them.
65. I don’t think I have a green thumb, but I know which plants I can grow and which ones I kill.
66. I have pots of wave petunias and impatiens on my porch.
67. I worked at a fast food restaurant when I was 16. I promised myself I would never work around food again and I haven’t.
68. I worked as a Judge’s in-court clerk for about 8 years.
69. I swore people in.
70. I issued warrants of arrest.
71. I sent people to jail.
72. I didn’t always agree with the Judge, but I always respected him.
73. It was the most interesting job I’ve ever had, but I’m glad I don’t work there anymore.
74. I can’t drive long distances because I tend to fall asleep.
75. When I was a baby my mom used to put me in the car and drive around to get me to fall asleep.
76. I hate to fly, but I do several times per year for my job.
77. I’m not really afraid of flying, but I hate being in such a small space with so many people and I hate rough take-offs and landings. I once threw-up on people sitting on either side of me during a particularly rough landing. I felt embarrassed at the baggage claim.
78. I love to read.
79. My favorite color is blue.
80. I HATE onions of any kind, but I don’t mind onion powder.
81. I love garlic.
82. I once saw a moonbow.
83. I collect inspirational quotes; I write them in small notebooks. My husband reads one or two quotes from my notebooks each day.
84. I like movies with happy endings.
85. I am a Leo and everyone who asks is surprised when I tell them.
86. I never want to own a white car.
87. I’m afraid of heights.
88. I don’t take any medications, but I take a lot of vitamins.
89. I love yards sales and thrift shops.
90. I’ve always wished I could sing and draw, but I can’t do either.
91. I love people watching, especially at airports.
92. I didn’t start drinking coffee until I was 30.
93. I started drinking coffee once when I was camping because I liked it with Irish Crème. After that I drank it every morning. I love to go camping and boating.
94. I once witnessed an autopsy.
95. I was dating a medical examiner.
96. I have been a second wife three times.
97. I am a closet hippie.
98. I have never smoked cigarettes even though I have lived around smokers most of my life.
99. I once won a pound of gold from a car dealership when I bought a Toyota; I ended up getting around $4,000.00 for it.
100. Yes, I will do a shot of tequila with you.